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Welcome to my blog. I will take you through my struggles as a woman, mom, business owner, and my walk with God.

Why Compare?

Why Compare?

There’s this woman I know, she’s amazing. There is nothing perfect about her, but she’s an amazing person. The problem I have with her is her spirit of comparison. If you need something from her, she will give it to you. This woman was always available when I needed someone to talk to. She would give me great advice and always checked on me throughout the process.  Whatever I was going through, she was there for it all. If you needed a place to stay, she opened her doors to those she cared for. Even though she has these great traits, she can be a smart ass. She’s not as bad as she used to be, but you better believe you will not take advantage of her and not feel her raft.

She has been through so many things in life especially in her adult life. She overcame depression and low self-esteem. She survived horrible relationships. I could go on, but you get it. When we talk she always say the right thing. She talks about how her relationship with God is better than it has ever been. Through all of these great things, she often compares herself to other people. I don’t think she does it on purpose, but it happens. She’ll see someone on social media winning (so they say) and she will start thinking she’s doing something wrong. Couples will be posting how great their relationship is and she’ll get sad because she’s still single. She never comes out and say she’s comparing herself to others, but I know she is.

What is the spirit of comparison? Do we serve a God of comparison?

The spirit of comparison is when we allow the enemy to get into our head, which will cause us to compare ourselves to others. When we compare ourselves to others, we are doing a disservice to ourselves by thinking we’re not good enough or we’re not doing something write.

God is not a God of comparison. He has made each of us in our own way. God does not like it when we compare ourselves to others. When we compare ourselves to other people, it’s disrespecting God and what he has created. It’s like us telling him, we’re not satisfied with the way he made us.

Are you really okay with disrespecting God? You are who you are and the only way you’ll be happy is to remove the spirit of comparison.

One day I sat with my friend and told her she needs to stop comparing herself to others. Surprisingly she didn’t argue with me. I expected her to say it wasn’t true and become very defensive. Her reaction was the total opposite. She told me that she tries not to compare herself to others, but it’s hard. Even though I knew she was going through this and I was ready to talk to her about it, I didn’t know what to say. How could I help her? Would she ever remove that devilish spirit from her life? The only advice I could give her at that time was to pray. I know prayer sounds cliché, but it works. I told her to get closer to God and ask Him for help. We can get through anything in life with prayer and work. Now don’t get me wrong, I know she can’t just pray her way through this, she has to put in the work.

What work? When she feel like she’s comparing herself to someone on social media, shut it down immediately. If there is one person in particular that she constantly compares herself to, stop following them on social media. It’s okay to not follow someone. It doesn’t mean that person has done something to you, but it means at this point you’re not strong enough to follow them and not beat yourself up. Social media is a great source if it’s used in the right way, but it can also break you down if you let it. Comparison doesn’t just happen on social media. It happens in the work place, school, around family, at the mall, on vacation and all of this is going on in our head. At this point I hope she stops comparing herself to others, but I’ll let you know if it worked in part 2 of Why Compare?


I Am Not Your Mother

I Am Not Your Mother